Month: July 2020

How can you tell if an INFJ is hurt? – Sharing

  1. INFJs often act different when they’re hurt. They might even have a whole different personality.
  2. If you’re close to them and they are barely talking or even responding, there’s a good chance. They will look withdrawn.
  3. Even if they’re talking, there will be no enthusiasm like before. All their words will seem shallow. They won’t go in-depth in any topic. It will probably just be “small” talk.
  4. INFJs tend to cut people off often. The famous doorslam.
  5. If not doorslam, they will avoid communication as much as they can. Even meeting you. They will find every excuse to avoid that.
  6. Since INFJs have a hard time dealing with their emotions, INFJs prefer isolating themselves at times. They take this time to figure out how they’re really feeling, heal, forgive and move on. They may come out a different INFJ, you never know.
  7. If you’re THAT important to an INFJ and they were hurt, they will try to fix it and make you realize why it hurt them (in case you don’t know why they were hurt). They might end up crying in front of you. They don’t do that often though.

But overall I’d say it’s really hard to spot a “hurt” INFJ. They never show it. They tend to have a different personality on the surface which makes it harder. They are too complicated to be figured out. Even if they’re hurt, they will keep letting themselves get hurt unless they can no longer take it. That’s when “enough is enough” mentality hits in. But like I said, since INFJs are hard to figure out, you won’t really know if an INFJ will just kick you out of their life or maintain a distant relationship or try to fix it.

For me, if that person really matters to me, I will let my pain be known to them. I often cry. If they don’t, then all hell break loose. They will never see the same me. In the worst case scenario, I will just cut them off. But if they reach out for help or something, I can’t really say no, so I just maintain a distant relationship.

Once realization hits, actions are taken. But it really depends on where an INFJ holds that person in their life.