Category: Personal Thoughts

An Anonymous Girl -Greer Hendricks & Sarah Pekkanen

“If the man you loved gave you a reason to doubt him, could you ever trust him?”

“We all have reasons for our judgements, even if those reasons are so deeply buried we don’t recognise them ourselves.”

“It is easy to judge other people’s choices. It is far more complex when the choices are your own”

“An sometimes the people who seem the most accomplished and together are the ones who can hurt you the deepest” 

It was one of the books in my kindle, I procrastinated to read. Least I expected to complete this book in a night, last night. *goosebumps*

The moment you start reading it, you have drawn yourself into the world of a doctor and a subject and if you have done a research study before, this even feels very closer to heart.

This book is about a psychological study on ethics and morals that turn into a game of a cat and mouse. Who is the cat and who is the mouse? The subject of the study or the psychologist doctor who narrates the game?

Remember: the rule of the story is to be open and honest and avoid pivoting away from any embarrassment or pain these questions provokes.

You’re Invited: Seeking women aged 18-32 to participate in a study on ethics and morality conducted by a preeminent NYC psychiatrist. Generous compensation. Anonymity guaranteed. Call for more details. – sounds impressive eh! After completing this book, I can’t help but feel extra careful the next time I consider signing up for a research study. You do not know who is using your information and what are they using for.

 

Already Rajini-fied Part 2(Spoiler’s Alert)

Kaiyil Kedachathu Tholanjaa
Innum Romba Puduchathu Kedaikkum
Aana Aasa Adakkida Therinja
Inga Ellaa Kaaladiyil Kedakkum

“You got to lose something in hand
To value and cherish what life throws back at you
You got to control the desire to possess
To get the world under your feet”

Woahhhh what a lyric!! This song actually makes me happy!

It’s unfortunate that I missed this song both the times I watched it in the cinema. However, this time I managed to watch this song in my third time and this time was to “reward” myself. I made my mum and sis watch too, and their reaction after that, I’ll share in a short while.

Well, this is a long overdue post, but what a coincidence!! It had been exactly 2 months since I watched it the first time and I can still remember how I felt that day at Cathay with my movie buddy! It was an impromptu and we managed to get the tickets!!!

I guess this is the “true Rajnism” … Some even said, “we got the old Rajini back”. I even came across an article about how Rajini replicates from his previous movies. Though I could not relate to these 80s movies, I was able to relate to his style and how it made me happy when I was a kid. I remembered how when I was a kid, I used to go around and imitating him saying “oru thadavai sonna, nooru thadavai sonna maathiri” or “en vazhi thani vazhi”..

*Petta Parak*, one can’t explain the level of happiness one can feel, and it is evident on the viewers’ face. It was not just the first show, fans who expressed such an intense level of happiness, but even people from young to old, and not a regular theatre-going showed a strong sense of enjoyment and satisfaction.

Though I watched Petta thrice, I thoroughly enjoyed it all the three times despite knowing the storyline, twists and turns. However, watching it in the cinema impact, was even better! Hmm… to be honest, it does not have a strong storyline. But the cinematography and the presence of all the artistes  ESPECIALLY RAJINI and his charm which made the movie a blockbuster. The scene in the canteen, the subtle romance with Simran are some of the scenes I can watch over and over again.

Watching a movie can be considered as a past time, hobby or a family/friends activity. There are different aspects an individual expect in a movie. Some watch it for narrative, while others watch it for entertainment. I am a person who is more towards the latter. I do not watch movies which makes me sad. I prefer movies which are more relaxing, exciting, thrilling or entertaining.

When we say ‘I love Petta’ or ‘I enjoy watching Petta’ (or any other film for that matter), what exactly happens within us is that we are carried from each level to another level subconsciously.

Upon finish watching the movie, mum was very upset for Vijay Sethupathi and kept on whining about it. Here’s a short description of my mum and the correlation between her and movies. She is a person who does not watch movies often. So I was rather surprised by her reaction towards this movie.

Though, at the end of the movie, especially when used to seeing Rajini as a “HERO” since young, his mind twist character did make me “feel cheated”. And the moment when he says “he wanted to tell a story……………..” All I felt was “Crap!!!!”

Another friend of mine also shared with me that she did not like Rajini playing such a role, especially with VS. (This friend came to watch it for VS with me). She instead gave an alternate suggestion for the ending.

“Rajini should have only revealed that VS is not his son to audience and not VS himself and instead made VS dance along with him in the “Raman aandalum” song!!”

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SHARING : By Nouman Ali Khan

Yousuf AS was incredibly good looking. Musa AS was unusually strong.

Yousuf’s gift was turned against him. It became the reason for so much grief in his life. Musa AS s strength became a great trial and brought him so much pain.

What Allah has gifted you and me with can be the source of a lot of good in our lives. But it may also be connected to our greatest turmoil. May be that’s what Allah will test us with most. But there’s more.

The devil knows your gifts too. And he wants to use people around you to turn those gifts and make them feel like a curse. Allah hasn’t just blessed you with outwardly goodness like looks, bodily strength, wealth or intellect. Sometimes He’s given you qualities like empathy or patience or kindness or a giving nature or a love of spreading goodness or an ability to be good counsel etc. The devil observes these qualities in you and he wants to rob you of them. How does he do it?

If you’re kind, the devil might incite some people in your life who you’ve been nothing but kind to, to be the worst towards you. If you’re a helper he may incite some you helped to strike at you as if you’re an enemy. If you’re a giver the devil might use someone you gave to accuse you of being greedy. If you’re a teacher he might use a student to call you ignorant. The bottom line is, he might use those you served or were good to in some way and get them to be bad to you. Our prophet SAW came with the message that binds hearts together and strengthens the bonds of kinship and family. Those closest to him in his family accused him of breaking families apart.

And why does the devil do this? So those gifts Allah gave you…the gift of giving or teaching or helping or being merciful or empathetic or caring or patient etc.. that you say to yourself that those aren’t gifts. They’re just something people take advantage of. They’re a curse instead. You should stop wasting your time and just care about yourself. Live your own life.

And in doing so he robs you of the gifts Allah gave you that you were supposed to use to please Him. Remember that those gifts are there so YOU find purpose. He wants to see how much you cherish these gifts. They’re not cheap and they’re not free. What pain caused by people are you willing to overcome to not let go of what Allah gave you? That will show to you and to your God what value His gifts hold in your heart. Don’t let the compassion that drives you to serve people be poisoned by their lack of appreciation or even their unjustified venom.

Don’t let your mind be overrun by those who hurt you. Let them be a dot in your rear view mirror that keeps getting smaller. You have much bigger things to do in life than letting the devil preoccupy you with those who tried robbing you of your gifts. Your best response to them is to ignore them and to do more good than you ever did before. Nothing burns them, and the devil, more.

My ‘Holiday’ – Holiday Trip to Perth & Bangkok

My love for travelling goes a looooooooooong way!

That feeling of being on top of the world when you step foot in another country! WOAHHHHH….

Sometimes you get to know yourself or your travel partner/s even better when you are travelling. Moreover, one will learn from new experiences and cultures.

Interesting, very interesting indeed 😀

When I read travel blogs, usually it is always about the picture perfect locations, or the astonishing views and the yummilicious food images. But what happens before a particular journey? How does one prepare? (Actually ME). What happens during the flight? What surprises awaits you ?? How is like to travel with your friends/ acquaintances?

This time round, it was a work trip to Perth City and ex-colleagues trip to Bangkok.

Pre-Trip Perks

Unlike other years, this year we had our Annual Meeting held at our Perth Office. Which means we were going to meet our colleagues from another side of the world.

My very first official trip. Sounds exciting eh!!… But trust me, I really wish I was on holidays. There were so many places that I wanted to visit but all went in vain.

Likewise, on another note, how would you feel when your ex-travel chat group suddenly revived almost a year and a half later and decided to travel again?? Yesss! A Friend came back from US and decided to hit us up! Poof! Our group revived !

Looking back to the trips with family especially, it had always been mad “rush” at home before leaving to the airport. My dad – being an “overly” punctual person, always expects us to be at the airport at least 3 hours before the flight!!!! But for these two trips, I was working till last minute before heading to the airport…!! Now that is the real #madrush

In Flight “Entertainment”

To be honest –  I am not a big fan of flights. Yeah! Contradicting I know.. Loves travelling but not a fan of flight!! It’s the feel of claustrophobic. Sometimes it feels like suffocating. But as always, decided to settle down and make myself comfortable! Just when I turned to my left, my colleague was already browsing the channels in that small tv infront of her!!! Apparently SIA has not change their tv and remote control for the past “don’t know” how many years !!! By the look at the screen, it was pretty obvious that it was “aging”! – maybe aged!

Unlike Android, our (iPhone) EarPods cable is different hence I couldn’t use them to connect to the sound cable in the plane!! 🙄🙄 Like do I have a choice???! Just had to wait for the air stewardess to distribute the headset. However, it was a waste!

I started browsing the channels, but nothing, NOTHING caught my attention. Yeahh!! I do have a problem in starting something new… it needed a proper time, situation and venue, even when it’s just a show! Hence, I don’t consider “flight” to be one !! I decided to switch to the map, chuck the headset into the seat pocket in front of me. I took out my earpods, put them on, made myself comfortable. Thank god I had my kindle and THE ONLY SIX SONGS I HAD IN MY PLAYLIST to accompany me throughout my journey to Perth.

On the other hand, flight to BKK felt like I was in a car race !!! – It was a “swift” journey! I Guess it happens when you are engaged in conversations 🤣🤣

Perth City

Just like in Mersal, the moment Vijay exits the airport, a car stops right infront of him to pick him up, the car stopped right infront us to pick us up! – rewind ….. (*dreaming).  Actually it happened but not the way I dreamt.

Suddenly someone approached as we came out after collecting our luggage. With a highly spirited voice – Australian??? American?? or a Strong British accent, “Denaaaa, he hugged my colleague….. and they started talking… They were literally having a conversation. I stood there awkwardly like a lost kid. Though I thought  he wouldn’t know or recognise me, I was wrong. When Dena introduced me, again in highly spirited voice, “ohhh you must be Jame’s niece!! again with that strong accent. Before he takes the next step, I waved a BIG HI to him. *awkward* !! Its a challenge to be put in such a situation.  o.O I became conscious. Only god knows why was I blushing! Not sure if it was to my advantage or disadvantage, but I got that “princess” treatment. !! Moreover I also felt as though they treated me like a kid. Not too sure if it was my height. However, these people were so welcoming and hospitable. It was indeed a pleasant and memorable moment.

We headed straight to the hotel which was just about 20 minutes away from our office building. That district is posh compared to our office here in Singapore which is an industrial estate. Though it was a luxurious hotel, we weren’t able to fully utilise it as we were busy with work.

Since transition was taking place, we did nothing much but  work. However, during the weekend, I managed to visit my friend at Madeley, a suburb, she lives in Perth.

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This district is too beautiful and serene to live in. I could do my happy dance there, without being afraid of being watched.. *chuckle* ….. My friend almost convinced me to migrate there. As much as wanting to visit my Uni campus, I couldn’t find time. – ” I am so going there for my convo!!!”

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This shot was taken during Maghrib. *Madeley in ❤ Love ❤ . It was indeed a quality time spending with my friend and thanks for the lovely scrumptious meal !!

Well, Sunday was a family day! Went to my cousin’s place and spent my time there with my nephews. The last I saw the two when they were toddler and baby. Now they were all grown up with a number 3.

Bangkok – The Shopper’s Paradise

The last time I went Bangkok was in the year 2013. I remember having a certain amount of budget to spent for shopping and ended up splurging till I was broke when I came back. Well this time was better I guess!!

These people go Bangkok frequently that they know the places in and out. By the time we landed at BKK, it was almost dinner. We went to check in at the Lemontea Hotel which was located at Pratunam, few minutes away from the BIGGEST MALL.  I had the BEST welcome drink, lemon tea in my life! During our First night itself, after dinner, we started shopping at the night bazaar behind our hotel. It was almost midnight when we came back to the hotel. But our night didn’t end there. We had a lot of things to catch up on and ended up sleeping almost 4+ in the morning!!

This trip was all about shop and eat and bonding sessions. We had so much to catch up, since all of us were separated???

BKK was a short, brisk and fullfilling shopping trip.

Official trip – Checked

Shopping trip – Checked

R & R – Coming soon !! *happy dance*

~Travelling is not something you’re good at. It’s something you do. Like BREATHING~

Happy One Month Birthday!!!

one mth

Wow!! Today marks one month since I created this public blog. Started off my day with this email. Surprisingly it brought me a smile. It seemed like a tiny winny sense of achievement. Especially when yesterday I thought I should close down this site as I have about 5 drafts in my inbox. I kind of lost the momentum and energy to write. I felt discouraged, especially when I have so many thoughts processing in my mind but when it comes to putting it in words, I tend to go blank.

But hey! with reference to my previous post, I should just write away my thoughts and SHARINGS, slow and steadily and bring back my momentum 🙂

 

SHARING : Why do we feel pain? – editted version

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Whenever you say ” I am not your type of person that…..” know that you are protecting your egos image of yourself. What i often see in faith circles is people pretending they are something they are not because they don’t want to accept where they are in this very moment. In many ways it is not life that is painful, our labels make it painful. Let me explain. If I say I am successful, rich, and likeable person then anything that threatens that identity directly threatens me. If in a particular company I am not liked then my entire identity is threatened and I feel pain. As they say if you live for people’s acceptance you die by their rejection. Or if I lose my wealth and I am defined by something that is mortal and subject to change, we are rooting ourselves in the world which is mortal and variable that we feel instability, anxiety, and uneasiness. Unless our identity is in Allah and based on Him outside circumstances can affect our inner reality. This is why people are so affected by even the words of a complete stranger online. One Buddhist teacher once said if someone gives you a gift and you refuse to receive it, who ends up with the gift? They do right. In the same way, when we refuse to receive something, someone says they are left with the negative energy of that thing. We may intellectually understand this, but the problem is when it comes to living this reality it becomes hard. Why? Mostly because we do ourselves based on societies opinion of us and now with social media we have numerical value on every post and picture that tells us how relevant or irrelevant we are to others. This is how the world sucks us in. Its sells us the lie that our importance is dependent on our influence in the world when the Quran so clearly states that our value does not come from fame, money, or family names but from our God- consciousness and righteousness (Taqwa). Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you.” (49:13). So when we turn to the world for our sense of self worth we become enslaved to illusion. This is why the Prophet (pbuh) said, ” Be in the world as if you were a stranger or a traveller along the path.” (Bukhari). We must remember that our identity as Muslims is not dependent on other Muslims on our family or even the ummah as it is represented in this era, our identity is based on Allah and rooted in His Love that is unconditional. If we do this, if we rely on Allah alone and define our existence based on Him then nothing else in this world can affect us, no comment, no family member, no loss, no failure. We can find our peace in the chaos because we will see with the eyes of our heart that in the hands of Allah, everything is perfectly where it should be. That nothing is out of place. That everything has been written so that we can know our Lord and return to Him through the path of Love!

Credits : #Quranquotesdaily

Sometimes, it makes me wonder, how is that certain things just appear in front of you when you need it the most? okay.. maybe not need, but think??? For instance, don’t you get startled when one fine day you google about Dubai, and then the very next moment, you see ads on Dubai all over your social media accounts??

Anyways that’s the “internet trick” – or whatever they call it. Let’s not get there. But like mentioned above, our thoughts attract the things we want to see. In this case – this reflection over here was a very timely reminder for me. I could relate to every sentence in this reflection. The need of acceptance is very crucial, especially when it comes from loved ones, colleagues, friends or even bosses that when we feel a slight declination in it, it affects us very much. But on the other hand, why aren’t we feeling that way towards Allah? Or at least enough when compared to Dunia? Why are we so engrossed with Dunia affairs that we fail to fulfill for Akhirat? Have we forgotten what we are created for?

I used to have disagreements with my family, especially when my thoughts contradicts theirs, but when come to think of it, what is the purpose of our life? Recently, out of the blue, my Best Friend whatsapp me. She asked “what is the purpose of your life” At first I was startled. I stared blankly at her message. And then I replied her stating “nothing actually. I am going with the flow. ” – See! that was my reply to her initially. And then, I asked her back. The reason she even asked me in the first place was because she didn’t knew it herself. o.O Thereafter, I replied her stating “actually my purpose of life is “supposed” to be working towards Jannah.”There I go. I mentioned “supposed”, which means I know what’s my purpose right? But I am not doing enough. Everything had already been written for us to comply. All we have to do is to follow. Doesn’t it sounds as simple as that?? Yet “Dunia affairs” overrights! 

However, its not that “Dunia affairs” are not important, but working towards “Akhirat” is also equally as important and it should be balanced. Eventually one has to channel it in the right path.

Indeed it’s a thoughtful reminder!!